


I know I kissed you before but I didn't do it right

by AshEtMBlinis6_7_77



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Childhood Friends, F/F, Friends to Lovers, Heavy Angst, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:33:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27887590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshEtMBlinis6_7_77/pseuds/AshEtMBlinis6_7_77
Summary: At night, Catra doesn't have anything to do. So she just thinks. Too much
Relationships: Adora & Catra (She-Ra)
Kudos: 3





	I know I kissed you before but I didn't do it right

I want to hug you  
Hug you so hard that you can never escape my embrace  
Hug you so hard that you can only think about me all day  
Hug you so hard that you can never live whitout my arms around you.  
But I can't.

  
I genuinely can't.  
Why?  
You are so fragile  
So vulnerable around me  
A little bird  
You always tend to think I'm your pet, sleeping at your feet, waiting for you to touch my ears to play with my tail.  
I'm not your pet Adora.  
I'm a liar.  
I'm your predator.  
You're my prey.

  
You should get away from me. I wanted to tell you that so many time. Shadow weaver made the message clear! Don't you see it idiot. How disgusting am I. How horrendous my thoughts are around you. How messy my face is when I think about holding your hand.  
Honestly I may be a sinner but you're worst Adora.

You're a hypocrite.

You see everything and what do you choose to do about that?  
YOU JUST SMILE ADORA. You made your way through life with that dumb smile on your face. Oh no I wish I could say that it was only stupidity, it would have made it cute at least. But it's not, you're not stupid Adora, Shadow weaver always told us you were the smarter one, as well than the sporty one and the pretty one etc, bla bla bla. You're very clever Adora, you know how to fake it. Fake it so much that even you little miss perfect has to believe your own lies.

  
I pity you Adora.

  
You're not even aware of what you really are, you're trying to live a normal life by yourself with all your new best friends. Smiling sparkling and saying shit about happiness. Adora you have to remember :  
People like us shouldn't be happy.  
I can't be happy Adora. I know it. So can't you.  
This fate could be avoided we couldn't be happy together in the horde but we absolutely could be less miserable.

  
Together we could have been our true selfs. You had everything Adora, you had friends, you had shadow weaver, you had good position.I had you.

You took everything away from me.

The only thing I wanted on that planet, you had to go and give it to others people! To stupid people! To useless people!  
They never cared about you Adora just like you never care about me. I know it! I'd been looking in your eyes since we were child, I'd been looking for you love for so long. And I only found reject. I only found you abandoning me.

Happy elsewhere hidden in a fake perfect world. Oh if I could destroy everything Adora, start over our lives, if I could get back to that night.  
It wouldn't change anything.  
It would be purely for my satisfaction.  
But my satisfaction is important now that you're gone. My pleasure is important. I'm important. Now that the prodigy is a mistake people rely on me. For real now.

Not like your stupid promise of taking care of each other.  
Did you ever take care of me? Did you ever look out for me? Did you ever even look at me Adora?  
No you were too busy being the Shadow Weaver's Favorite, Connie's friend, N. 1 scout, She-ra.

  
I was left with scrumb of you. I had to fight everyday to not die. To not get forgotten by you. So I scratched you again and again and again but I didn't do it right so let me try when I see you next time. Show me your pained expression, show me your hate, show me all theses things that you hide behind this stupid smile. You know we can only be messed up together. Your sparkly friends wouldn't understand right?

  
They live in big mansion, they got parents, they're happy. Even if they're at war, they're at happy. They didn't have to suffer like we did. They weren't waking up in sweat, they didn't have to hug each other at each nightmare. They weren't afraid of walking, running, laughing or screaming. No they were free Adora.

  
I know that's what you want more than anything.  
But Adora, being free is a lie, you're never truly free, you always thinks of Shadow Weaver's figure at night just like I do. She stills with you alive or dead, and she will stays. When I close my eyes very deep I can still feel the electricity zapping in the end of my body. I know this isn't going to go away.

So why should you go away Adora?  
We were not born to be free Adora.  
We had a purpose. We had a goal. I had you.  
We were born to be together.


End file.
